The Actions of a Son (Proverbs 10:1)

Often a child will be the reflection of the parent. I know that in the past I have seen children acting inappropriately and wondered about the parents. We tend to blame the parent for the actions of the child, often blaming lack of discipline as the culprit. In truth, however, actions are done because of the state of heart. A parent can poor their whole being into a child and still not penetrate the stubbornness of the child.

"The proverbs of Solomon. A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish and self-confident son is the grief of his mother." Proverbs 10:1, Amplified

Chapter ten continues with the proverbs of Solomon. It is addressed as such to establish authorship because there will be some later in the book that are actually written by other kings.

It is interesting to see the dichotomy of the family dynamic in this verse. A wise son makes a glad father. This wise son in obviously making wise decisions. There is something built up inside of a father that desires others to comment on the behavior of the child, emphasizing on the good qualities, of course. It is because the father is the disciplinarian, he is the voice of authority in the family, he is the master craftsman. Due to his work, the child grows into a responsible and wise adult.

But a child who is foolish brings grief to his mother. As the father deals with the discipline, the mother deals with the nurturing of the child. She grooms the child, feeds the child, bathes the child, changes the child's diapers. Her relationship with the child is more intimate than it is with the father. As the child moves on to make more and more foolish decisions, the heart of the mother is broken with grief and worry for the welfare of the child.

Now this verse and my interpretation of it is by no means an absolute. The one question that I would have to raise is this, "What of the single parent household?" I then say that it is even harder for the single parent, because now that single parent must take on the qualities and responsibilities of two separate parents. However, the outcome will still be the same. Whether the child is wise, or foolish, the parent will still have a similar reaction. A single mother will well up with pride for her wise child. That single mother has acclimated to the idea of discipline; it is because of her new view on discipline that the child has made better choices. The same can be said of the single father. He now takes on the role of the nurturer as well. The relationship between him and his child changes in a way that is unfamiliar to him. However, he will feel differently toward the foolish child, his heart will break for that child. No longer can discipline be at the forefront of his being, rather the caring nurturer will overcome his being.

In either case, whether it be a complete family unit or not, the Lord has instilled inside the parent these characteristics. There needs to be that opposite, so the Lord has also instilled in us the ability to take on the other characteristics that are missing in the family dynamic. It is not the existence of a mother and father that make up a family, rather it is the love that fills the rooms of the house that make the family.